Going to two of the B Div west zone matches at Nanyang.. it makes me terribly sad... it makes me ache for the days we played as a team... it makes me miss the days where we had an actual match together.. It makes me pine for the past... the past which memories are fading, leaving only hazy ones..

Above all, it makes me miss the days where I played with familiar people, the days where I'll be the one on court and not the ones shouting outside of it, I even miss the adrenaline, stress and fun that a court match bring.. Playing with the club, juz doesn't feel the same D: Likewise if I go and join Ngee Ann's netball, it doesn't even feel remotely the same... with all the different team mates and coach.

I also miss the times where Anni and Songzhen will be screaming at us, each of us will shout encouragement (ok, maybe that's me only), the joy when we got into second round, our shared hopes and aspirations... I particularly miss the tension from the two highlight matches of our last west zone. Tanglin and River Valley... I admit I have a hate and like relationship with that tension....

I yearn for the condition that my reflexes, thinking, skill level and passes during then..

Lovely game that Ycs played against Nanyang :) Too bad for the loss... I would like our team to play against theirs with both teams playing at our best.. but it's impossible.. and that's the saddest thing that I'd glean from that match.. That's no way that my team can get together and play like we did before...

I apologize for the moody tone here.. but it was on my mind since I came back from Wsp V BP's match.. That and having sad Bleach/Fairy Tail soundtracks to fuel my sadness...

It hurts so badly to understand a truth that I chose to never acknowledged...
I'm starting to float away.. someone hold on to me please...